It’s almost like saying you like to hang and bang.” “When people log onto online dating, they want to have a positive experience. Shannon Tebb, a matchmaker and dating consultant working downtown Toronto, explains that the term Netflix and Chill is a major turn-off. “Folks have the right to say no to going over to someone’s house, no to having sex once they are at someone’s house, and the right to ask and make sure every situation they are getting themselves into is as clear and consensual as possible.” “That is something that has to be talked about and it has to be very clear.” “I don’t think anyone should assume that someone will have sex with them just by having them in their house or by going on a date,” she adds. If you think someone is trying to get you into bed, ask.” “You should continue to ask until you know what that person is trying to say to you. “You always have the right to ask for clarification,” she says. She notes that Tinder takes a lot of the pressure off different forms of online dating, but users shouldn’t assume that being invited over for Netflix and Chill will necessarily mean sex. “It’s like ‘hey would you like to step out for a moment?’ Those kind of phrases will get the idea across.”Ĭameron, who is a sexuality studies major, works as the deputy coordinator of outreach and communication at TBLGAY. “It’s an easier way to say what folks would say otherwise in person,” she adds. Kaylee Cameron, a sexual health team lead at Student Community Leadership and Development, says that these sexual codewords have always been around. “Do you have your condoms? Are you prepared? And are you making sure you have all those resources that you might need to have a good night?” “Being safe also means to plan for sex and sexual activity,” she says. Hooking-up or not, she encourages everyone to be safe and highlights the importance of consent, asking questions, and telling either friends or family where you are going and what you’ll be up to. “Folks looking for a relationship, a connection, or something deeper might be interested in putting in a little more effort into presenting themselves, as well as scanning potential partners,” says Flicker. She notes that those using Tinder might be after something different as opposed to those using longer-form dating apps like Plenty of Fish and OkCupid. But depending on where you are posting or fishing, you might be looking for different things.” “For better or for worse, it’s made sex and casual sex easier to access for some people. It has, for quite a while, been code for ‘I’d like to make out with you and spend some time together’.”įor those using online dating, Flicker says it has certainly made the process of finding a ready and willing partner much easier. “The idea was to have someone come over, cuddle up on the couch, and see what happens. “It’s really not all that different from 20 years ago when I was dating,” she says. “Usually in the context I’ve heard it, Netflix and Chill means coming over to hook-up,” says Sarah Flicker, York professor who has done research on youth and sexuality. When you throw down this line, are you really looking forward to the coffee or is something else on your mind? Who drinks coffee at night? C’mon, we’re talking about sex. Not normal coffee, but really fucking hot coffee. We might equate it to the new-era “hot coffee.” You know, that time after your lovely date, you invite someone in for a coffee. What does it really mean when we say “Netflix and Chill?” The general internet consensus is that it’s a euphemism for sex. Netflix and Chill: it’s a phrase, it’s a slogan, it’s an internet meme, and it’s officially capitalized in the Excalibur cannon now and forever.īut more often than not, students and single-folks are throwing around a new breed of code for sex, whether it be casual or not. You may also be aware of the infamous tidbit, “Netflix and Chill.” People fill their short Tinder bio with tidbits of information on how much they love dogs, the bar, or cosplay. If you are familiar with Tinder, you are even more aware of what many people toss into their Tinder profile. If you are unfamiliar with this geo-location, often shallow, but overly effective dating app, you should start indulging in some options. Start swiping, because asking someone out in real life is becoming less socially acceptable, and hoping on the fiery world of Tinder is where it’s at. Face-to-face interaction is on its last limbs, and the process of hooking-up has gone from charm and wit, silly dates, and awkward moments, to well-lit and Photoshopped photos.
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